Staring at my reflection until one of us breaks. Hoping for a change. Fearing a tear. Expecting a disappointment. Accepting.
I'm on the fence about mercy. Either it's something that I should try to find in myself and apply to myself while I'm at it, or then it's a bunch of horse shit. I keep having enlightments to support both alternatives in turns. "Ooh, I'm still young and I don't have to be anything yet. The youth is all about losing yourself just so you can start finding yourself, testing and crossing your limits, enjoying your ignorance, making mistakes and being thankful that you had the chance to make them." Those are the even enlightments. The odd ones in between sound more like: "Ooh, are you a moron or just plain dumb? You're too old to not know anything about yourself, to not have anything. You've lived for two whole decades and what the fuck do you have to show for them, huh? Do you really believe that things will change for you? Because why in the hell should they? Ps. You suck."
I don't know which enlightment is the sound of the prosecutor and which of the defender. As if that even matters because the judge is drunk and on crack and the jury is made up of plastic mannequins.
Aren't all you mannequins glad I wrote you another one of my stories? Don't get too excited though, you might crack up.
A song from my Sad Saturday Soundtrack
I'm on the fence about mercy. Either it's something that I should try to find in myself and apply to myself while I'm at it, or then it's a bunch of horse shit. I keep having enlightments to support both alternatives in turns. "Ooh, I'm still young and I don't have to be anything yet. The youth is all about losing yourself just so you can start finding yourself, testing and crossing your limits, enjoying your ignorance, making mistakes and being thankful that you had the chance to make them." Those are the even enlightments. The odd ones in between sound more like: "Ooh, are you a moron or just plain dumb? You're too old to not know anything about yourself, to not have anything. You've lived for two whole decades and what the fuck do you have to show for them, huh? Do you really believe that things will change for you? Because why in the hell should they? Ps. You suck."
I don't know which enlightment is the sound of the prosecutor and which of the defender. As if that even matters because the judge is drunk and on crack and the jury is made up of plastic mannequins.
Aren't all you mannequins glad I wrote you another one of my stories? Don't get too excited though, you might crack up.
A song from my Sad Saturday Soundtrack
